I thought it was time to collect all the Velvet Underground jokes in one place. In case someone enterprising person decides to collect them all and publish a book. I don't actually know any, but this one popped into my head a minute ago. It's pretty terrible.
Q. What do you call a Stephanie who's been out in the sun too long?
A. Baked Alaska.
I said it was terrible.
The Velvet Underground Jokes thread
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iaredatsun
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The Velvet Underground Jokes thread
underground, overground
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calaminehello
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Re: The Velvet Underground Jokes thread
what is lou's favorite thing to do to a book.
what is john's favorite vegetable in which the central leaves do not form a head.
how do you get maureen pregnant.
who is sterling's favorite jim jim.
what is doug's favorite contraction.
what is john's favorite vegetable in which the central leaves do not form a head.
how do you get maureen pregnant.
who is sterling's favorite jim jim.
what is doug's favorite contraction.
*dextrorotory components synthesis of sympathomimetic musics (contains the equivalent of two complete stereo records)
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bobbydriver
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Re: The Velvet Underground Jokes thread
Knock Knock
Who?s there?
The interrupting Lou Reed
The interrupting Lou Ree?
AWRIGHT!
Who?s there?
The interrupting Lou Reed
The interrupting Lou Ree?
AWRIGHT!
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iaredatsun
- Now jelly rolls in the street
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Re: The Velvet Underground Jokes thread
I think these will go in the Velvet Underground Book of Riddles. I feel I should know the answers but don't. I kind of hope there are no answers.calaminehello wrote:what is lou's favorite thing to do to a book.
what is john's favorite vegetable in which the central leaves do not form a head.
how do you get maureen pregnant.
who is sterling's favorite jim jim.
what is doug's favorite contraction.
underground, overground
Re: The Velvet Underground Jokes thread
There are answersI think these will go in the Velvet Underground Book of Riddles. I feel I should know the answers but don't. I kind of hope there are no answers.
Read
Kale
*ucker
Morrison
You'll
any sounds that we feel would detract from the performance has been left in place
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threechordwonder
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Re: The Velvet Underground Jokes thread
The Velvets were discussing existentialism.
"To do is to be" said John, the European classicist, quoting Socrates.
"To be is to do" said Sterling the medievalist, holding up his copy of The White Goddess, albeit he knew he was bluffing.
Lou pointed to his collection of fifties and sixties bop singles and slurred a few words. "Do - be - do - be - dooby dooby do".
[There are no Velvets jokes. You just have to slot them into existing jokes.]
"To do is to be" said John, the European classicist, quoting Socrates.
"To be is to do" said Sterling the medievalist, holding up his copy of The White Goddess, albeit he knew he was bluffing.
Lou pointed to his collection of fifties and sixties bop singles and slurred a few words. "Do - be - do - be - dooby dooby do".
[There are no Velvets jokes. You just have to slot them into existing jokes.]
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threechordwonder
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Re: The Velvet Underground Jokes thread
Wait ... I think I have one.
Two fans were visiting Scotland and booked a Velvet Underground Magical Mystery Tour.
They jumped on the coach and ended up at the Stirling Morrisons.
(Well, maybe this won't be funny outside the UK.)
Two fans were visiting Scotland and booked a Velvet Underground Magical Mystery Tour.
They jumped on the coach and ended up at the Stirling Morrisons.
(Well, maybe this won't be funny outside the UK.)
Re: The Velvet Underground Jokes thread
I'm reading the latest Velvet Underground biography. Not brilliant, but it's a good loo read.
any sounds that we feel would detract from the performance has been left in place
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calaminehello
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Re: The Velvet Underground Jokes thread
that's the one.
*dextrorotory components synthesis of sympathomimetic musics (contains the equivalent of two complete stereo records)
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threechordwonder
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Re: The Velvet Underground Jokes thread
Tasteless satire ... but it exists. Do not read if easily offended.
http://www.thecivilian.co.nz/lou-reed-f ... ever-know/
http://www.thecivilian.co.nz/lou-reed-f ... ever-know/